The Graceful Pursuit of Happiness
“It’s about a feeling,” I heard the spin teacher say, as he cranked up the volume and dimmed the lights in the studio room for our class, pedaling faster on his stationary bike to keep up with the beat of the music. “Let’s ride!” He beckoned us to match his pace. I let myself get lost in the melodic beat that seemed to be reverberating in the air. He is so right. I have that feeling, I thought to myself, and it was a familiar one. A tingling ran through my body as the eagerness of new possibilities washed over me. I reflected on where I was in my career, having had twelve solid years of progression, complete elation, and finally a bit of stagnation. I felt my Spirit calling me onward. The music blared loudly enough to make me feel like it was becoming the rhythm of my own heart. I willed my legs forward, trying to ignore the exhaustion burning into my thighs. With my heart pumping and my entire body breaking into a sweat, I felt the shedding of an old identity, making space for a new one to emerge. Time for another evolution. Three months later, I found myself starting a new adventure as the Sr. Director of a Global Professional Services team at a local label and artwork software company, a dream job for me. I reveled in my latest manifestation, every ounce of me emanating with pure gratitude at my good fortune.
But it wasn’t always this way. In my early 20s, I’d started off my career as a software analyst, having foregone any inkling of an artistic life for the safety of what I “should be doing” to act responsibly in my financial future. After a small stint in music and dance, I’d thrown myself into my intellect completely, choosing a college major in Computer Information Systems. When I found a job post 9-11, it was as straight-laced and structured as my intellect had promised. I had a beautiful apartment in the city, I worked in a snazzy office overlooking the Chicago River, and I was newly married. By every external measure, I was succeeding. But part of me was dying inside.
After a series of serendipitous events and a few courageous conversations at work, I found myself accepting a new position inside my existing company, one which seemed tailor-made for my skillset and turned out to be exactly what my heart was looking for. I felt alive! Throughout the next several years, I continued finding creative ways to shape my job as I evolved my own interests and talents.
So what changed? How did I get my train moving on the proverbial ‘right track’?
Truth be told, it was messy. A masterful skier named PJ Jones once said, “Great skiing is just a series of elegantly linked recoveries.” And such is life. As I navigated through some slippery slopes, I certainly crashed on multiple occasions (both figuratively and literally - I have the scars on both knees to prove it!). But the more I “hit the slopes”, the more I got in line with some simple principles that served me in architecting my own destiny and creating my own magic. They are more or less as follows:
1. I got crystal clear on what I wanted my next experience to feel like. I used my imagination to vision what life would be like when I took the next turn in my career. I literally daydreamed about the cast of characters I’d want to work with which seemed to will them into my reality. Even more masterfully, I did the same imagining when I was ready to find a new partner after my divorce.(More on that in my book Falling Together: A Tale of Believing in Your Own Magic.)
2. I stopped focusing on the ‘how’. I had done enough forcing of my own agenda on the ‘how’ to realize that it sucked the excitement out of the experience. And, I’d read enough books on spiritual law to understand that God, Source, the universe, or whatever you chose to call it would take care of the ‘how’. I finally decided to get out of the way. And I expected good things. I discovered that the universe had a sense of humor when it delivered my husband to me with the exact name I’d been daydreaming about!
3. I listened to the gentle nudges of my inner voice. We all have those voices in our heads; those gentle reminders big and small that tell us: We are meant for more. Those nudges were easier to come by when I sat quietly in meditation or when I was exercising, getting myself into ‘the zone.’ I decided to listen to the subtle suggestions that eased their way into my consciousness, whether it was to make that one phone call, describe that one idea I had out loud at our next meeting, or sign up for that dating website and see what happens. The tiniest intuitions that I heeded ended up making the biggest impacts in my life.
4. I enlisted a set of believing eyes. My visions for my beautiful future were amplified when I had someone to share them with. Whether that was a supportive colleague, my sister or friend, having someone to hold the vision with me solidified the energy around what my imagination had come up with. Having someone to celebrate those successes with was a whole lot more fun than patting myself on the back!
5. I realized that happiness is an inside job. I found that my happiness came from accepting who I was at my core. I began to see my strengths as my gifts to share, and I set forth with an intention to use them to make the world better in the best way I could. As I evolve, so does my purpose, and so does my sense of well-being.
An invitation to play…
As the world will continue to turn, so will we continue to evolve. How are you evolving in this moment? I invite you to close your eyes and sit quietly. Take a few deep breaths. Do you hear your inner voice? Is there a part of you yearning to connect with something deeper?
The whisper of my inner voice reminds me that I’ve got a dharma to fulfill - one that includes helping people to connect back into the most basic and fundamental part of themselves - their Spirit.
If you’re feeling the nudge to explore this further for yourself, I may just be the set of believing eyes you need to help you along the way. Remember: It’s about a feeling.
For more information, contact me at vanessa@vanessalin.com.
Vanessa Lin is a life coach and author of Falling Together: A Tale of Believing in Your Own Magic. She is passionate about self-growth and living life intentionally. She resides in Skokie, Illinois with her four wonderful boys and husband Jeremy Lin (the civil engineer, not the basketball player).
Find her book at https://www.amazon.com/dp/1952070023?ref_=pe_3052080_397514860